November 21, 2000
Today marks the 5 year anniversary of my father's death. It's hard to believe it has been that long. It didn't upset me for a long time, and now it doesn't much. But there are times where I just wish I could be a daddy's girl again. I wouldn't be who I am today if that hadn't happened, so in ways, I'm thankful. But I also know that God had a reason for making that happen. Somewhere down the road, maybe I will be able to comfort someone going through something similar. I know there were many that helped me and became a second family to me.Some memories:
* Playing in the snow
* Stripping wire
* Crushing cans
* Taking the wire and cans to the recycling center. Also, collecting glass bottles and seeing how far we could throw them at the dump.
* Tickle fights
* Atari
* Roller skating around CMSI
* My first drive around the "block" (in my area, that was a 2mile by 2mile block) which ended in hitting a guardrail a quarter of a mile from home.
* The good ol' 88 GMC Sierra
* The good ol' 88 GMC Sierra breaking down all the time down in the Arbuckles
* The Dollar General Christmas Parties (mostly remembered for the dang good chicken... I wish I knew how to make it!!)
* Random times in the living room where we'd sing to anything on the radio
* UNO!!!! (don't think too much into that, Scott..)
* RUMMY!!!
* SOLITAIRE!!
* Playing Uno or Rummy while it is storming to keep me calm.
* Setting his alarm clock an hour ahead of time so that he would get up on time.
* Mowing.. and how proud he was when he got the best lawnmower that Walmart had. It even had a cupholder.
* Cleaning
He was always so proud of me. I never really understood it while he was alive though. But it was brought to my attention soon after his death. He really adored me. I guess that was probably really obvious to everyone else, especially since I am an only child. I'm glad I know now because in some ways I feel like I am still trying to make him proud of me... doing the best I can at all I do. That's the only way he'd want it.
The more I think about it, the more I realize how I always wanted to be like him. Most kids wouldn't think that crushing cans and stripping wire would be fun, but I did. I still enjoy it now. I still love mowing and obsessively clean sometimes. I really admired my dad. He made the best of what we had. And he worked REALLY hard for it. And best of all, he was HAPPY with what we had. I can only imagine what kind of role model he'd be for me if he was still alive.
I miss you daddy..
posted by Unknown @ 11/21/2005 08:59:00 AM
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